Tender Hearts in a Hooah World
Posted by: s2sheathertabers on: February 9, 2012
Earlier this morning I wrote a blog entry for Wives In Bloom, a blog and e-magazine for Christian military wives. I wanted to share it here, too, as I think many women can identify with this- military or not.
~Heather
Sunday morning, our large family filed into a pew in the back of the church, got ourselves situated among our piles of coats, Bibles and drawings made in Sunday School, and settled in for the worship service. As the music started and the congregation began singing, I immediately felt my heart stirring. The words coming out of my mouth humbled me and I felt my hand raise in adoration to the One I was singing to. As tears welled up in my eyes, I felt the confused stare of my husband. I quickly blinked back the tears and put my arm back down. We’ve had this conversation before. Why am I crying? What’s wrong? Why am I so emotional? As a former marine and an actively serving soldier with PTSD and TBI, my husband is completely foreign to the world of emotions that I live in. He says he’s the “conservative, quiet, kneal-when-you-pray Christian” and I’m the “crawl-up-on-his-shoulders-so-I-can-beat-you-in-the-head-with-my-Bible-better Baptist.” I reigned myself back in and sang along with the congregation, blending in with the crowd. In my mind, I was dancing before my King, and bowing before His throne. But in the back of that sanctuary, I was much more reserved.
As the music ended and the pastor came forward, I prayed that God would speak to my heart. I carefully took notes, citing all the verses our pastor made reference to. I laughed at his jokes. I nodded along in agreement. I clapped. I AMEN’ed. I shushed my kids. I nuzzled in closer to my husband in the pew. And then he said it. As if the pastor had been in my home and in my mind and in my heart, he said, “You have to keep your life centered around Christ! What is it that you think about all day? Who or what do you think about the most? Who or what are you concerned with more than anything or anyone else? Wherever your focus is, that is what your life is centered on.” I almost fell out of the pew. I knew my answer and it wasn’t Christ. It was my husband. My husband is a wounded warrior who is no longer working. We spend every day together. E-V-E-R-Y. D-A-Y. We’re together 24/7. I spend my day trying to make him happy, worrying that I’m falling short. I’m always asking him what I can do to help, how I can make things better, if I did something to offend him, or how I can be a better wife. I think it drives him crazy. I’m so thankful to God for the gift that He gave me in my husband. After previously having a marriage that ended in the abandonment of me and my four children, I’ve come to hold on so tight to my new husband and our marriage, never taking it for granted for a minute. Loving my husband is a good thing. Honoring him is a vow I made to him before God and my friends and family. But when did I allow him to become the center of my heart? When did I let the gift become more important than the Gift-Giver.
Convicted, I sat there in my seat, trying hard to follow the rest of the sermon, but my heart continued to ache. My mind continued to search for truth. Then, out of no where, I received the final word that I needed to hear… “Do you hold someone else’s opinion of you higher than you hold God’s opinion of you?” I wanted to run to the altar right then. Without thinking, I pulled my hair forward on one side so my husband couldn’t see the tears streaming down my cheeks. Pretending to be studying a passage of Scripture, I bowed my head and pleaded with God to help me. I begged His forgiveness for allowing someone else to sit on the throne of my heart. I thanked Him for loving me more than I’ve ever deserved to be loved. I told Him that I knew I was His daughter, His princess, a daughter of the King. And I asked Him to help me remember that when I felt like so much less.
The entire focus of my pastor’s sermon was finding balance in our lives, by centering our lives on Christ. I got that message. The Holy Spirit gave me another message that morning, too. I pulled out a piece of paper and wrote the words, “Tender hearts in a Hooah world”. I knew that I needed to share this with someone that might be going through the same thing. Many of us live in a “hooah world”- married to a military man that we love and want to please. They don’t understand our emotions, our vulnerability, or our tenderness. Sometimes, quite honestly, they may be a little afraid of it. But that doesn’t mean that we need to hide that side of ourselves. We don’t need to try to pretend we’re less than who we are. We shouldn’t hide our sensitivity and our emotions, especially when they are emotions toward our God, out of fear of rejection from our spouse or anyone else. God gave many of us a tender heart for a reason. He lavishes His love upon us and is so pleased when we lavish our love upon Him in return. He doesn’t care what others think about the gifts of our tears or our praise to Him. In fact, when others mock, question and ridicule us for our outpouring of love towards our King, our love becomes a sacrifice of praise and becomes that much more beautiful in His sight. He doesn’t view our emotions and vulnerability as a weakness but rather as a strength that He designed in us for a purpose- to bring Him glory.
Don’t Be One Of “Them”
Posted by: s2sheathertabers on: February 7, 2012
Last week the media was buzzing with news about abortion, breast cancer research and birth control pills. A number of interesting developments took place causing a number of controversial conversations and heated debates. I, personally, took the opportunity to use social media to post links, share the facts, and share my faith. Believers and non-believers readily perched themselves on both sides of the issues. I love a good moral debate and the conversations that stem from them.
One acquaintance I’ve made on facebook is a military wife that lives in another state. I don’t know her personally. We’ve never met. I don’t even know her last name. But she commented on a post I made about a national abortion provider. She’s pro-choice. Pro-women’s-rights. Pro-abortion. She shared her views on a woman’s right to choose. I replied by sharing my conviction on the sanctity of human life. We discussed alternatives. We discussed life. We discussed other services offered by the abortion provider. We didn’t fight. We discussed. Then she posted the following words that hit me hard:
“I’m pro choice, woman’s body woman’s choice. I guess the way I see it I wouldn’t like anyone telling me what to do with my life choices. Only God can judge me 
But thank you for being respectful. Nice when you can have a mature conversation instead of a bunch of name calling!”
What hit me so hard was not her stance on the issues, but rather her stance on US. You know, us Christians. Us, who defend God, defend life, defend the unborn. Us, who so often in the spirit of standing up for God, unintentionally bow to name callling, blame pointing and trash talking. Us, who more often allow our righteous anger to turn into self-righteous anger.
What are we doing?
My facebook friend taught me something last week that I pray will stick with me for a long time. God’s been teaching me alot about what it truly means to glorify Him in the last few weeks and this one instance was my wake-up call. Girlfriends, I urge you to stop and remember who it is that you represent. Let’s ban together and share our Father’s love with a lost and dying world. Let’s give Christians a new reputation. Let’s be the heart, hands and feet of Christ. When people hear you’re a Christian, don’t let them think you’re “one of them.” Let them see Christ shining in you!
Miracle
Posted by: s2sheathertabers on: January 23, 2012
Today is the annual March For Life in Washington, DC… an event that I’ve participated in a number of times. The March provides an opportunity for Christians like you and me to stand together and show our nation’s leaders and decision-makers that it is unacceptable to kill an unborn child. It’s one day a year in which the voiceless innocent can be heard. It’s about standing in the gap. It’s about defending life. It’s about miracles.
I grew up in a Baptist church and was part of a youth group that was taught the sanctity of human life. I knew at a young age that abortion was wrong and as a teenager I was vocal about God’s love for all babies – born and unborn. I never expected that at the young age of 21 I would find myself right in the middle of the biggest choice I would ever have to make – life or death for me and my unborn child. I was married and expecting my first child and excited about our future. A fatal disease was not part of my plan. Being told that I only had a 50% chance of surviving (and that was only if I aborted my child) was not part of the life I’d dreamed about. Saving my life or my baby’s was not a choice I wanted to make, but it was a choice I was faced with. It was a choice I made unwaveringly, having been so rooted in God’s truth. Deuteronomy 30:19 says, “I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live.” God makes it clear. The choice is ours.
I chose to trust God that day. I chose to carry a child that the best perinatologist in St Louis swore would kill me. I chose to believe God had a plan. I chose life. And God showed up. God kept His Word. God delivered with huge blessings. God removed my life-ending disease. God spared my life and my daughter’s. God gave me the most beautiful, perfect, healthy, red-headed baby girl the world has ever seen. God even gave me four short, easy hours of delivery! God gave us life.
We named that little girl “Miracle.” Her birth story is published in a book with others like hers in the hope of encouraging other women to chose life when faced with similar, frightening circumstances. I’ve had the opportunity to share her story with Congressmen and young girls facing unplanned pregnancies. Her life brings hope to many. Her name opens up doors of opportunities to share Christ with others. Her life is a testimony of God’s goodness. Her legacy will be a legacy of life.
“Choose life, so that you and your children may live.”
The command is clear. The choice is easy. Trust God. Choose Life.
Chocolate Gravy
Posted by: s2sheathertabers on: January 11, 2012
Sometimes I like to do things a bit different… I like to surprise my family at breakfast… I like to hear my kids say, “YUMMMMM!” Here’s an easy recipe to help you achieve these same feats! You’ll be a hero. You’ll be cool. You’ll be Super Woman!
What you’ll need:
1/4 cup cocoa
3 tbsp flour
3/4 cup white sugar
2 cups milk
1 tbsp softened butter
2 tsp vanilla
Here’s how to make the magic:
Whisk the cocoa, flour and sugar together, whisking away any lumps that form. Add milk and whisk well. Pour mixture into a saucepan and heat over medium heat until mixture reaches a consistency similar to gravy (7-10 min, stirring frequently). Remove from heat. Add butter and vanilla. Stir until butter is melted. Serve over biscuits. Enjoy the “ooooohs and ahhhhhhs”!
The Bucket (of cookies) List
Posted by: s2sheathertabers on: December 22, 2011
I’m a mom of 5. I cherish quiet time. So every morning, my wonderful husband loads up the 4 big kids to take them to school and he takes our 3 year old with him. This gives me about 45 minutes every morning to take a hot bath, have some quiet time, and prepare for my day. After dropping the kids at school, my husband goes through the McDonald’s drive-thru to get me a Coke. He knows how much I love my morning Coke… it’s my version of coffee. And every morning, there’s a handful of ladies that work the drive-thru who know my 3 year old and think she’s the cutest little girl on the planet…and I have to agree. So they talk to her and she blows kisses to them and sometimes they even give her extra happy meal toys. She comes home so happy every morning and that makes this momma’s heart happy.
So, as I made my list of people I wanted to make buckets of Christmas cookies for… the McDonald’s ladies crossed my mind. What an easy way to bless someone and thank them for blessing us? But that made me think… who else have I missed? There are a number of people in my life who I have come to rely on that I don’t know personally… the trash man, the mail lady, the crossing guards. There are so many people that I can bless without leaving my house! I encourage you to ask God how you can bless someone this Christmas… someone that doesn’t usually make your list. God fed the multitudes with a little basket of bread and fish. You never know what He will do with a small bucket of cookies.
The Baby In The Manger
Posted by: s2sheathertabers on: December 12, 2011
The baby in the manger doesn’t care if there are no gifts under the tree.
He gave me the gift of eternal life, anyway.
The baby in the manger doesn’t care if there is no snow.
He warms my heart, anyway.
The baby in the manger doesn’t care that I’m not out shopping in the hustle and bustle.
He’s happy to have quiet time with me, anyway.
The baby in the manger doesn’t mind that I often complain about my pain.
He brings healing to me, anyway.
The baby in the manger doesn’t fret over my broken relationships.
He offers restoration, anyway.
The baby in the manger doesn’t wish for more than He has.
He gave His all, anyway.
Warm Soup Belly
Posted by: s2sheathertabers on: December 5, 2011
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You know that feeling, don’t you? That feeling you get when it’s cold and dreary otuside, but you’ve just finished a bowl (or two) or warm, delicious soup. That feeling of being warmed from the inside out. That feeling of comfort and contentment. It’s warm soup belly.
God’s Word is our spiritual soup. As we face a cold and dreary world, the Bread of Life warms our hearts and transforms us from the inside out. He gives us that “warm soup belly” feeling that brings us comfort and contentment… yet has us craving more.
If your current life situations have you shuddering from the cold, I encourage you to warm up with the Word today. And here’s a great recipe for a great potato soup that will most certainly give you that physical warm soup belly feeling…
Baked Potato Soup in the Crockpot:
Wash and dice 5 lbs large potatoes, do not peel, place in crock pot
Add 8 cups of chicken broth, 2 tbs minced garlic, 1 large diced yellow onion
Cook on high for 6 hours or on low for 10 hours
Then…
Use a potato masher to finish mashing potatoes in the crockpot
Melt 16 oz of cream cheese slightly in the microwave and stir into crockpot mixture
Stir every 10-15 minutes until soup is well blended
Salt & pepper to taste
Serve up with shredded cheddar cheese, green onions, bacon and sour cream. DELICIOUS!!!
Smelly Christians
Posted by: s2sheathertabers on: November 23, 2011
After a long day of decorating the house, grocery shopping and caring for a sick child, I treated myself to a nice, long soak in the jacuzzi tub tonight. There’s nothing like a hot bath to ease your body and there’s a certain satisfaction in wiping off the day and watching it roll down the drain. After drying off, I pulled out my favorite pair of satin pajamas. Girls, we’re talking about the softest, silkiest leopard print button-up pajama shirt with matching pants you’ve ever seen. So comfortable. So classy. So pretty. So…. smelly? That’s right. My beautiful pajamas smelled horrible! Why? Apparently with all the hustle and bustle around the house over the past few weeks, these pajamas must have been in a load of laundry that sat in the washing machine too long. I know you’re all familiar with that mildewy, musty, icky smell that I’m talking about. As fast as I pulled that pajama shirt over my head, I pulled it back off and reached for a comfy t-shirt instead. Clothes that sit too long after getting wet STINK.
It suddenly occurred to me that our Christian walk can be the same way, if we’re not careful. We get washed in the Holy Spirit. We receive a downpour of blessings. We drench ourselves in the Word. And then we sit. We grow stagnant. And ladies… sometimes we even begin to stink!
With the holidays approaching, let us take this reminder to not overlook our relationship with Jesus. Don’t leave it where it is. Don’t forget about it. Don’t think, “I’ll come back to this later.” The most well-groomed, prettiest, biggest Bible carrying, satin leopard print wearing Christian is not very effective to a lost world if she stinks!
Touching The Cross
Posted by: s2sheathertabers on: November 17, 2011
By Heather Tabors
I have a three year old daughter who is growing more and more independent and strong-willed every day. I’m sure you can relate if you’ve ever had a toddler in your life. The other night I got her into her jammies and brushed her teeth and then we knelt together beside her bed to pray, as goes our nightly routine. At the end of our prayer, we closed with, “Thank you for dying on the cross. I love you, Jesus. Amen.” … just like we do every night. But this night, there was something a little different going on in my daughter’s heart and mind. As we closed in prayer, Maddie pointed to the large, ornate, iron cross that I hung on her nursery wall when we moved into our home last year. I’m ashamed to admit that this cross had been nothing more than a decoration in our home until that night. Upon closing our prayer, my sweet little girl pointed to the cross and said, “Mommy, I have to touch the cross of Jesus.” Being familiar with toddler stall tactics, I continued trying to usher her into her bed, but she’d have nothing to do with it. “No, Mommy!” she said, pointing again to the beautiful cross. “I HAVE to touch the cross of Jesus.” Knowing that I wasn’t going to win this battle, I lifted her up and watched her chubby little hand reach out and with one pudgy little finger, she touched the cross of Jesus. With a smile she looked at me and said, “Thank you, Mommy.” A flood of emotions rushed over me. “No, thank you, baby,” I said as I tucked her into bed. Thank you, for reminding me of the urgency I should have to touch the cross of Jesus. When was the last time I had felt any urgency to reach out to my Lord? Thank you, for showing me the value of lifting someone else up to touch the cross of Jesus. When was the last time I went out of my way at all to bring someone to the cross? We tend to get caught up in our routines, our daily rituals… we easily forget the sacrafice made on that cross and we view it as nothing more than a decoration. Dear friends, it’s time to touch the cross of Jesus.
So I’ll cherish the old rugged cross,
Till my trophies at last I lay down;
I will cling to the old rugged cross,
And exchange it some day for a crown.
Promises, Promises
Posted by: s2sheathertabers on: November 15, 2011
By Heather Tabers
How many times have I made a promise to someone, and then broken it? It’s usually not for selfish reasons, or lack of motivation, that I break my promises. I’m just a people pleaser…. so I have the unfortunate tendency to promise someone that I’ll do something and then I fall short of the ability to complete the task. I meant to do it… I just couldn’t. I’m so grateful that our God has not only made numerous promises to us… but He has the ability to hold true to His Word… and He has a track record to prove that He’s trustworthy to do what He says He will do.
So what is it that you need?
Are you worn out? God promises rest!
“Come to me all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” ~Matt 11:28
Do you feel defeated? God promises victory!
“No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.” ~Romans 8:37
Are you nervous or anxious? God promises peace!
“But all who listen to me will live in peace, untroubled by fear of harm.” ~Proverbs 1:33
Are you confused, unsure, not knowing which way to go? God gives us direction!
“I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you.” ~Psalm 32:8
Are you searching for God? He promises you’ll find Him!
“I love those who love me, and those who seek me find me.” ~Proverbs 8:17
There are so many more promises from God. Some sources say there are over 3,000 promises in the Bible! No matter what problem you are currently facing, God has a solution. And He promises that He will do what He says He will do! How awesome is our God?!?! I’ve started a Promises journal, recording every verse I find that God promises something to me and I would encourage you to do the same. When circumstances surround you that seem bleak, there’s nothing more comforting than to read a written promise to you from the King.
